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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25361281">Loving You Is What I Do</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CapNstuff/pseuds/CapNstuff'>CapNstuff</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Captain America (Comics), Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hydra (Marvel), Implied/Referenced Character Death, Light Angst, Marvel Universe, Mission Fic, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Pre-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Pre-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Pre-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Pre-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Pre-Civil War (Marvel), Pre-Relationship, Protective Steve Rogers, Protectiveness, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Tumblr, Tumblr Prompt, Undercover Missions</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 08:35:00</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,805</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25361281</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CapNstuff/pseuds/CapNstuff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>You and Steve were normally all giggles and flirty sayings but after a mission went wrong, you wanted nothing to do with that stupid asshole blonde.</p><p>Prompt: “You don’t control me. You don’t own me.”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Steve Rogers &amp; Reader, Steve Rogers/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>53</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Loving You Is What I Do</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Warnings: swearing, angst, fluff, a bit asshole!steve, insecurities, small description of dead/hurt children</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Steve ‘stupid head’ Rogers was the utter bane of your existence. It has only been two hours and you already miss his warmth he’d always send your way. He’d softly flirt with you and this certain smile would caress his features any times his eyes would set on you. He’d tease and poke at you but delicate, loving touches would fall onto your hands or thighs that felt like fire on your skin. The two of you would always sit right next to each other during movie nights with bright grins and flustered hands inching towards each other.</p><p>You sighed as you hugged your pillow, laying on your bed. A couple of tears had run down your cheeks as you could almost still hear Steve scream that he loved you. However, it was all in the heat of the moment in an argument. He didn’t really mean it, right? You shook your head as you were never really sure. He still kept Peggy’s picture in a locket that was near him at all times. You didn’t necessarily blame him as you know that she was his only connection to his past.</p><p>You sniffled and continued to watch your fan move around in circles, staring straight up. You still couldn’t quite believe his words. He had declared those three little words that you have been dying to hear since he melted out of the ice. But your insecurities had still gotten the better of you. Peggy was an amazing, intelligent, and kind person, not to mention a badass person at that. You felt like you couldn’t compare, even though you were just as great.   </p><p>You and Steve had just been sent on a mission that Fury strictly made to only track and report. Both of you had a pretty bad habit of engaging when told not to but everyone else was doing other missions. Even though Steve was practically the size of a brick wall, you were the only one’s left that fit the job description. You were assigned to, silently, infiltrate a Hydra ship that contained highly dangerous weapons. There were rumors that Hydra had been planning to steal a bunch of mutants and brainwash them into weapons, which is why Fury made clear it was to only be a track and report mission. You two got onto the quinjet and set it on autopilot, gearing up before arriving.</p><p>Eventually, you spotted the large dark blue cargo ship and flipped on the cloaking device so the quinjet would be hidden in case the clouds moved. You then jump into the water, silently hoping your bodies hitting the water with such force wouldn’t be too noisy. You breaststroked your way towards the ship, hands cupping through icy cold water. </p><p>Steve lifts you onto the cargo ship with him not far behind. You then notice two men standing outside on the deck. You grab one of the men from behind and cover his mouth. Immediately, you hit a couple of his pressure points which makes him fall limp to the ground.</p><p>Steve silently nods towards you and you see he’s silenced the other guy. You were able to sneak around into the main portion of the boat, feeling the warm air of the air conditioning. Your eyes went wide as you heard soft noises start to become louder and louder. Steve instantly grabbed you and you were stuffed into a small supply closet. </p><p>Your heart was beating too fast, his broad chest pressed softly against yours. Your breathing hitched and your eyes slowly moved up to his face. His head was already down, staring intently at you. You opened your mouth to say something but it quickly closed. Your hands started to move up against his chest and his large hands fit perfectly onto your hips. You leaned in slightly and his eyes were flickering from your eyes to your lips. Your heart was beating right out of your chest and your hands gripped his chest just a bit harder. </p><p>A loud scream made the two of you jump out of your own skin. A blush crept onto his cheeks and the two of you couldn’t bear to look at each other. “Yeah, um, w-we should, uh, go.” He scratched the back of his head. “Y-yeah! Um, yeah we should.” When the coast was clear, you got out of the closet and went searching for a computer to override. </p><p>You walked into the main control area and hurriedly put in a USB to grab any information you could. You were easily able to hack into it as the password wasn’t hard to figure out and you automated it to grab any information you could. Steve stood right behind you, keeping watch on the door. </p><p>You muttered a small “shit” as loud sirens started to sound around the ship, clear Russian poking through the speakers. “Ship has been compromised. Ship has been compromised.” You two take a quick glance, Steve eyes telling you to hurry up and you yelp in glee as it finishes loading all of the documents, taking it out of the computer. You two run out of the control room but your eyes widen as a bunch of Hydra men were waiting with big guns. </p><p>You promptly turn the corner, running as fast as you could right behind Steve until there was a dead end with a steel door. Steve busts it open with ease and you both run inside. Your panting became loud, disrupting the quiet atmosphere. You look around, and a sad whimper escapes your throat.</p><p>In the room was a bunch of cages, clearly wired to shock anything that touches the metal bars. In each cage held a small child. Your heart thumped against your chest as you dared to look at some of the children. They had been beaten, bettered, and many were killed. Steve was just about to pull the two of you out of there until you heard crying.</p><p>Steve grasped your wrist but you shook your head and inched towards the noise. “Y/n,” he warned but you felt the need to protect this child. You knew what Hydra would do. Hell, Steve knew what they would do to the kid. So leaving them behind wasn’t an option. You slowly walked up to the little girl and crouched in front of her. She sat, curled up in a ball, in the farthest corner of the cell.</p><p>You could hear her whimpers but you spoke as softly as you could. “I’m not going to hurt you. I’m going to get you out of here.” The girl was very wary of you at first, not believing a single word you’ve said but then she hears the men trotting up the hall. Steve yells at you to leave but you tried to break the metal bars instead. The little girl stared at you wide-eyed as you screamed at the electric shock the bars were giving you. You were able to break them in pieces, all of the men with very big weapons stood in the middle of the room.</p><p>Steve didn’t say a word as the three of you became surrounded. You stand your ground, keeping the girl securely safe right behind you while Steve was groaning at the mess you were all in now. Before you could react, the girl swiftly moves in front of you and freezes all of the men into big ice cubes. Your mouth is agape as their whole bodies were covered in ice, the room becoming slightly colder in temperature.</p><p>You all run out of the room and turn the corners of the hallway. Just as you were about to move out of the indoor areas, you were ambushed by two men. They were quick, aiming the gun straight at the little girl. Steve was yelling at the men and charging at them but it seemed like time was slowing. Steve seemed too far away to be able to get them in time. </p><p>You launched your body before the girl, a bullet hitting you right on your shoulder. “No!”<br/>Steve screamed, propelling himself on the men. The little girl ran towards you and applied pressure as Steve took care of the men. If you weren’t preoccupied with your bullet wound., you would’ve seen how enraged Steve was.</p><p>You were able to get safely back on the quinjet, especially since the little girl had made an ice bridge. Which, you definitely cheered with her. Steve hadn’t muttered a single word. You tried to talk to him but he just sat in the pilot’s seat, staring straight ahead. You sighed and paid your attention to the kid, asking questions the whole ride back while you started to stitch up your wound.</p><p>You all eventually got back and landed near the tower. Steve still hadn’t muttered a word but he did help you pack everything up and even guided you off of the quinjet. As you were walking up to the tower, you told some agents to guide her to the medical bay to get her checked out. You were about to follow until Steve roughly grabbed your other arm.</p><p>“Steve, what the f-” Steve quickly interrupted you, ferocity lurked between his eyes and his voice boomed through your ears. Your face twisted into concern over his behavior, why would he be so upset? “I cannot believe you. Fury gave us specific orders to track and report.” You sigh, harshly pulling his grip off of your arm. “Steve, she’s just a kid.” He huffed, eyes narrowing towards your figure. “So we have to save every kid from danger all the time?” Your eyebrows furrowed and your head tilted. “I did what I had to do.”</p><p>“Did what you had to do? You wouldn’t be hurt if-”</p><p>“If what, Steve? I wouldn’t be hurt but I’d let a child die? Did you not see the same things I saw in that prison? She was the only one left. And as far as I’m concerned, I will not just sit there and do nothing when people need help.” There was a long silence, none of you were going to declare another word. Nothing was to be said if you were being honest. You weren’t going to apologize for doing what you thought was right. Steve clicked his tongue, breaking the definite silence. </p><p>“Maybe you shouldn’t be on missions anymore. I mean, when I act upon my duties as an agent I’m not reckless and irresponsible.” Steve immediately cringed as the words flew out of his mouth. His expression then turned into a wince as he got a good look at your face. You really wanted to cry at the moment, scream, and yell at the top of your lungs but you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. </p><p>“So let me get this straight… you can stand up for what you believe in, even if that means becoming a war criminal or a but when I do it I’m immature and stupid?” Air seemed to completely escape Steve’s lungs, he just stood there and didn’t say a word. You were right of course. It wasn’t fair for him to ridicule you for something that he does all the time. It’s literally part of his whole Captain America-y presence is to not follow orders. “You don’t control me. You don’t own me. Please, shut your ignorant righteous mouth like your instances are better than mine.”</p><p>His mouth just opens and closes, not finding the right words to say. His eyebrows furrowing in the process but in the end, he says nothing. “Un-fucking-believable.” you muttered under your breath and tried to walk past him. His body collides with yours since he immediately stepped in front of you. </p><p>You open your mouth but he quickly beats you to it. “I love you! Don’t you see-” You pushed him off of you, breaking his sentence. You wanted to slap him for saying that. Love? What part of love is getting mad at another for doing what they thought was right? You couldn’t let him speak to you in such a way. There was no absolute way that he loved you, anyway. You then left to go to the medical bay and hadn’t said a word to him since, which happened three days ago.</p><p>A soft knock on your door made you jump and you sighed, rolling out of bed, and opening the door. “Look, Tony, I’m not-” Your stopped mid-sentence, shocked by the man that was standing before you. “Steve.” He looked like an absolute mess. Fresh and old tears were scattered across his cheeks, his nose was red and runny, and his beautiful blonde hair was disheveled all over the place. </p><p>“Can I come in? Please?” You sigh, “Am I going to get lectured?” He immediately shakes his head and tells you that he’s not here for that. You sigh once again and crack open the door a bit, letting him know to follow you inside.</p><p>The two of you sat on your bed, sniffles sounding across your bedroom. You only wait for Steve to converse, guessing he’s trying to get the courage to speak to you. His head turns a bit towards you before staring straight ahead. </p><p>“You know, I wasn’t lying earlier when I said that I love you. I am so sorry that I haven’t said it sooner… I-I was afraid. I was afraid that you didn’t like me back and that it was my own intuition.” He pauses to stare back at you, seeing as your fiddling with his fingers. You’re nervously biting your lips and a small smile forms onto Steve’s face. It’s always been a habit of yours to fiddle with your fingers and bite your sweet plump lips. You don’t say a word, so he continues.</p><p>“I’m so sorry for yelling at you. You’re completely right, I wasn’t fair to judge you for doing what you believe in. Especially because I do that all the time. Seeing you get shot, right before my eyes, frightened the shit out of me.” He chuckled a bit at you widening your eyes from his cursing. “When I saw you, lying on the floor, I-I didn’t know what to do. If I lost you, well I-I-’d…” His voice breaks down and he’s unable to finish his sentence. “It’s not an excuse, I know. I hope you’ll be able to forgive me, y/n.” He places his hand on top of your leg, his palm facing upwards indicating you to hold his hand. He wanted to know if you could forgive him, to at least be friends again.</p><p> Hope starts to fade out of his darling blue eyes as you state at his calloused hand. After a bit, you still don’t meet his hand and his heart sinks, thinking you don’t return his feelings. He starts to lower his hand off your leg but you snapped your head to look at his face. </p><p>“What about Peggy?” Steve gives you the most perplexed look, wondering why the hell you were talking about a woman from his past, and a woman that’s dead no less. “Peggy?” You nod, voice shaking slightly as you spoke. “You always have her locket with you. You always talk about her and it’s like your whole body radiates with happiness. I-I can’t compete with that! You love Peggy, not me.”</p><p>“Oh, y/n.” His hand comes up to caress your cheek, thumb moving side to side so delicately. “The only reason why I have her picture is that it ties me to the 30s. I love Peggy yes but I haven’t been in love with her for a very, very long time but I guess I was still in love with what felt like home. But that’s changed. y/n y/l/n, I’m so helplessly in love with you.” His eyes dazzled, sparkled even as he stared intently into your eyes. Like he had everything right in front of him.</p><p>A small smile forms onto his face, looking back at the memories with her. “Even when I would visit her, she’d tease me about you. She could see that every time I talked about you, I would just ‘light up like a Christmas tree’ as she put it.” You just stared up at him, trying to look at any sign of doubt. Luckily, you found none.</p><p>“I’ll only forgive you if you let me eat the last of your ice cream.” He grins brilliantly at you, leaning in closer towards your figure. You waste no time and press your lips against his, molding together and loving his cherry tasted lips. You start to pull away, smiling brightly at the pout that Steve pulled onto his face. You finally felt at home, just like he did.</p><p>“Say no more, doll.”</p>
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